A Throwback to Seattle, Last Year.

As some of you may recall, I spoke last year as part of the MozCon 2017 Ignite talks. It was totally random that I applied to even do one - I was riding a stupid wave of courage and decided I was going to make it happen. My moments of stupid courage (as I secretly refer to them as) tend to be the most clarifying, the most grounding. I wouldn't have moved to AZ if it wasn't for stupid courage. I wouldn't have published a few books if it wasn't for stupid courage. I wouldn't have dated pretty much every girl I've been with if it wasn't for stupid courage. And so on and so forth.

I sit here, a year later, reflecting on my experience in Seattle. It was the first time since Sweden I couchsurfed - I met an incredibly kind couple in the Brooklyn-esque area of Seattle who let me stay with them. We were above a Safeway, and I woke up to the sun pouring on me each and every morning partnered with an incredible view of the city. It simply did not feel real.

I haven't been in a fast-paced city since I visited a friend in Chicago Christmas 2011. Phoenix is not fast-paced - at least not yet (give it some time and the chance it stays entirely livable for a while longer). I realized how much I missed a true urban environment and strengthened my vow to never become a suburbanite (which I suppose I sort of am now, but regardless).

It was a taste of adventure and a much-needed connection to a Marketing community I'd never experienced before, being at MozCon. I mean, I do follow other conferences and absentmindedly check out the hashtags as they appear on Twitter, but MozCon to me is like - creme da la creme! I couldn't believe as I stood outside by the doors where all the smokers congregated that so many people I met there were REPEAT ATTENDEES. I was like, holy shit?! What is this world? I met so many incredibly cool, fascinating, and talented people, several of which who I have maintained some form of contact with (and at least many I added to my LinkedIn network, which is cool, but probably neither here nor there).

Marketing can be sometimes a tenuous, odd community to be a part of, frankly speaking. It's a field that altogether feels hard to measure or quantify. I never set out to be a marketer when I began my career - I had been brought up and studied to be a journalist, and that was that. But I graduated into a shit job market, and a few years of temping and working odd jobs later, I found myself very much ingrained in the quickly growing world of content marketing and SEO. 

It's a world that can be hard to keep pace with if you're not constantly learning or trying out new things. The hardest thing for me has been to decide what is not and what is worth my time. There have been so many flash-in-the-pan trends, which is depressing. I am not sure if the same is true for other lines of work - I would imagine yes, but I think marketing is especially so.

You would not believe, though, how small of a world it is. I met my friend's co-workers from across the country by randomly eating breakfast with them one morning. They asked me if I knew her - a girl I had first met at the Yucca a few years ago - and I was like, WTF is actually at play here?! Happenstance, kismet, etc., etc.

I learned a lot about Marketing in that short time, but mostly I reignited my interest in Marketing. It was inspiring. 

Speaking, on the other hand, was terrifying. All the storytelling events did not prepare me for appearing on a stage that the Seattle Philharmonic appears on regularly and that had been graced by the likes of Joshua Bell and Pearl Jam among others. 
In the end, I did the thing. And I did really well, FOR OPENING UP THE EVENT. 
I met someone recently who told me she was going to get me out of my comfort zone. She had a real valid point, but I am not always in said comfort zone. I tend to dwell in my comfort zone until I get bored. And then I just push myself way out of it, like an angry mother bird at a reluctant hatchling about to leave. Like maybe baby steps would be better? But this is not how I operate. And I have never operated that way. For all the mistakes I've made in my life (plenty), this approach has served me well. Speaking at MozCon is to this date the furthest I've been out of my comfort zone. I knew absolutely no one there when everyone else around me seemed to know countless others. I was a little unpolished and totally scared. I think people picked up on this (although I had the support of my co-workers and my friends and my family behind me, 100 percent, which I can't be thankful for enough). 

Back to Seattle. I met some *incredible* folks that I had the once-in-a-lifetime (maybe more?) privilege to speak with. Never in my craziest dreams did I imagine that this sort of fantasy would actually happen. I tend, though, not to think highly of myself or aspirations. But there I was, in the green room, meeting some of the kindest and most interesting people. One woman spoke about her journey coming out, another man spoke about his traumatic brain injury. It was a very eclectic group of topics. Although I don't remember much of speaking on stage, I do remember coming in and coming out and the high-fives that greeted me as I walked backstage once again. 

Afterward, I hung out with some of the other speakers and met Rand Fishkin!!! (who if you don't know, just Google it, and appreciate that slight pun later on.) We went to a few spots in Seattle, and I got to experience Seattle nightlife (sort of), which was very cool. Although I tried to be cognizant of my hosts and got home at a decent hour, feeling pretty satisfied about everything in some deep way I've rarely experienced. 

But one thing that really sits with me now a year later is how little I truly enjoyed this entire experience. At the time, I thought I did. My heart wasn't completely there, though. Last year was a year I half-lived, and it kills me now to think how I was just not present in anything. My head didn't clear up until a few months into this current year. 

Asides from Marketing and proving to myself I could do something remarkable by my humble standards, one belated lesson Mozcon imparted on me was the importance of being present. Being there, and actually BEING there. Putting away the phone, the laptop. Striking up conversations with strangers. Feeling the cool Pacific air on your arms and looking over the greenery-covered rooftops. Opening your mind to different ways of doing your work that you would have never previously considered.

I would go back if I could, and maybe someday, I will – and I will be completely there for it. 


Comments

  1. Reading this as I cannot seem to sleep late night somewhere outside Seattle, this calms me down, I admire your courage BK. Thanks for writing this.

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